Self Love is the Best Love

Hey everybody, this week I wanted this post to express something I believe we all struggle with. It’s called Self Love.

In today’s society, we have this preconceived notion as to what the standard of beauty should be. We have videos, posters, magazines and movies of these exotic women with big eyes, big lips, big hips and big butts. We tell our children that weave, make-up, faux lashes and fake nails are what defines them as being beautiful. Why, do we do that?

Growing up, I was called beautiful, unattractive, cute and down right ugly.   I allowed those people to tell me how I should see myself, and kept it enclosed within me. Today, I wish I could say I didn’t let that deter me, but I’d be lying. I have my beautiful days but most days I feel I’m ugly.

As I walk on my journey (and yes I’m almost 40), I have to be more self aware of me. I have to take my book back from those who tried to write the beginning of my personal narrative.  I have to take back my power and leave those who didn’t value me behind.

Now, let’s be real, we all have family and friends that gas us up and tell us we are beautiful, our outfit is cute and we are amazing people blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah… you know what I call that? B.S.…. 

Yeah I said it, Bull S…..  Seriously, let’s be real, our  moms, dads, siblings, spouses and friends are supposed to gas us up. It’s literally in the family/friend contract they MUST sign before taking part in the relationship, Right? 

We can all pretend that the way the world sees us should not affect who we are. But, when you are constantly being compared to the likes of Kim K, Beyonce, Rihanna, Idris Elba, Denzel Washington and The Rock, it’s hard to think you are anything, but less than perfect.  

So B., how does one love themselves?  The Bible says,

“Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud”, 1 Corinthians 13:4

To be beautiful is to not  think about if you’re beautiful. Rather,  just being the best beautiful you, that you can be!

 If you devalue yourself, then you can’t expect anyone else to treat you like a rare one of a kind diamond. 

What can you do to change or rewrite your beauty narrative?

• Tell yourself you are beautiful (in or our of a mirror)
• Write yourself a love letter
• Take yourself on a day
• on your worst days tell yourself, DAMN, YOU ARE FINE!

When you’re done with that;

• Wipe away the make-up or wear it
• Wear a bra or don’t
• Take the weave out or leave it in
• Grown a butt or keep it pancake style, It doesn’t matter!

Just don’t let the world paint their ugly picture of you! Take the easel, brush, or colors, and paint the picture yourself, then sign it with a kiss. 

Today, let’s change the stigma of beauty to whatever YOU want it to be!